Thursday, April 26, 2012


Oh, do I have stories for you.  But sadly, no time at the moment to do anything other than pop in and say hi.

So, hi.

But, when I come back, I'll be telling you a few things--

1.  About Easter.  (Oh wait.  I probably need to wait my standard two month lag-time to blog about events in our lives, don't I?)

2.  About our recent trip to Puerto Rico.  Where a man informed me that I have, and I quote, "heavy legs."

Thank you sir, for that lovely self-esteem booster. And allow me to suggest that you take a course in What Not To Say To Women.  Here's a spoiler: It will definitely include the word "heavy."

3.  About how HGTV is still here working on our house.  Which is difficult when you enjoy constantly wearing yoga pants and no makeup. And when they enjoy popping out with cameras.

4.  And finally, about how I had part 2 of my root canal surgery the other day. (Did you know there are multiple steps in a root canal.  Neither did I.)  During the procedure, my anesthesia wore off, and I could FEEL EVERY DARN BIT OF IT.

Do you want to guess what the Dr. said to me?

Calm down, hon.

It hurt so much, I actually kicked the seat.  Mainly because I couldn't reach the doctor.

Happy Thursday!

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Naptime and Lions

Yesterday morning, AG woke up with a little fever.  Being the completely rational mama that I am, I promptly hyperventilated, diagnosed her with about six different viruses, all while shoving Advil in her mouth wisely determined that it must be teething.

What are the signs of teething, you ask?  Well, in my (very limited and not at all scientific) experience, they include a low-grade fever, combined with a propensity for the word NO, constant whining, and the desire to sit on the couch and watch Toy Story 3 over and over again.

Clearly, I learned these symptoms when I obtained my medical degree at the University of NO.

Anyway, to help her sleep a little better, I put some fresh sheets on her bed, along with a new pillowcase.

Never too early to start rush, am I right?

I knew the lions on the pillow would either A) make her happy or B) freak her out (as they are clearly so menacing).  With the scary unpredictable moods of toddlerhood, it was a toss-up as to which one it would be.

Let's take a little peek at how nap time went down, shall we?

Me:  AG!  Mommy put a FUN, EXCITING surprise in your crib!  And by the way, how do you feel about the bonds of sisterhood?


Me:  (Thinking fast) Um, okaaaay.  Let me take this out into the hallway and get you a completely different, brand-new pillow!

Being the genius that I am, I decide to take the pillow into the hallway, flip it over onto the white backside, and bring the same pillow back in to her.  Too save time.

Because changing a pillowcase is SO tedious.

I go back into the room, and say:
Me:  Here you go, presh.  A brand-new white pillow for you.  Happy napping!

Being the genius that SHE is, she immediately grabs the pillow and FLIPS IT BACK OVER.  To see the lions.  And then gives me a look that says: Really, mommy?  I mean, REALLY?! Did you honestly expect me to fall for that?

Me:  (While nervously laughing and looking away) What are THOSE doing there?  How did THAT happen? So weird. Sneaky lions.

Or, sneaky mommy.  Ahem.

I told John this story later, and he died laughing.  And then said: "You know this needs to go on the blog, right?"

Right.  Because who wouldn't want to admit to trying to trick her two-year old as a result of being too lazy to change a pillowcase.

I'm all about keeping it real over here.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Spring Break

So, my girl is on a little spring break trip this week.  Yes.  Apparently toddlers get a spring break.  And NO.  It's not so she can go visit Club La Vela or anything like that.

I hope.

John and I have had the unusual experience of being kid-free for the last few days, and we've had a great time. Although it's clear that we've forgotten what it's like to be without her.  Here's a conversation we had the other day:

Me:  Hey babe, let's go on a run together!

John:  Okay, great.

Me:  (while huffing and puffing, and trying to keep the 3 Peeps I ate before leaving the house down.  Peeps.  Always a good idea, am I right?)  Babe!  When I said "run together" I meant at my pace.  NOT your freakish 6 minute mile pace. 

John:  (annoyingly barely out of breath) Sorry!  So what do you want to do tonight?

Me:  Hmmmm.....maybe grab dinner and then watch some tv. (See how exciting we are?)  I wonder what Ally Grace is doing right now?  

John:  I know!  Remember that funny thing she said last week?  

Me:  She's just the best.

John:  Really the best.

Me:  Can we go get her yet? 

(Possibly followed by a small crying fit and some highly dramatic statements about never being away from her again.)

(John really needs to learn how to hold it together.)

Our kid-free time should involve things like movies, dinners out AFTER 6pm, and just generally doing whatever we want, but totally ends up involving conversations about AG and how much we miss her.

(Although I have enjoyed sleeping in til 8:30 every morning (woo! watch out!).  And we did manage to go out for some fun dinners.  WITHOUT a diaper bag and a sippy cup in tow.)

We also saw 21 Jump Street last night.  WHY do movie people take movies that have the potential to be awesomely funny, and then trash them with vulgar gross-ness that ultimately makes me want to throw up in my mouth?

(Not a fun experience when eating Junior Mints. Just sayin.)

On a different note, HGTV came to our house last week for our first day of filming!  I wish someone had reminded me about my tendency to sweat when I get nervous, because that certainly would've affected my shirt choice.  Ahem.

Hi America.  Enjoy my armpit rings, will you?  
You're welcome.

Also, I really think the producers and film crew appreciated my obsession with their "clacker-thingy."

For the record, they don't call it "clicking the clacker-thingy."  Just in case you were wondering.  Although they will, very graciously, allow you to play with it off and on all day.  Clearly not annoying at ALL, I'm sure.


It was a fun day, followed by a crazy weekend of completely clearing out our basement for the show.  Also known as the Weekend that Sherri Spent Making Her Back Problems Worse.  Alternately titled, Hi Goodwill, Here Are Two Trailer Loads of Fun For You.

At least we know we are loved by our wonderful families, who helped us without complaining, and only required an ample supply of sausage and egg breakfast sandwiches.   Y'all are the best!

I'm thinking that's enough rambling for one day. You're welcome. And Happy Easter everyone!  I'd highly recommend enjoying some Peeps this weekend.

Just not before running.